The Nasty And Annoying Things NO ONE Tells You About True Love

As women, we are told very early on all about true love. Disney has drilled the idea into our brains our whole lives. We dream about it, we pray for it, we discuss it with our friends for hours, and yet the realities are less than 100% romance. Let's get real, when life gets tough we don't need Prince Charming we need a maid, a hefty savings account, an on-call nurse, and Samantha from Bewitched.

1. Your true love will clean up your puke after you've lost the flu battle. (hopefully)

2. You will undoubtedly fart in front of your true love.

3. Your true love will fart in front of you. (and probably relish in it.)

4. There will be moments when your sexy true love looks completely unsexy to you.

5. There will be choice moments when you consider the early demise of your one true love.

6. Your true love will leave his socks on the floor.

7. It's shocking, I know, but your true love's friends may hate you.

8. Sticky crumbs and worse will be left for you to clean up by your true love.

These little nasties can occur in any relationship, hey, we are human. We have bodily odors and faults. Just remember, you are not alone...your true love thinks you're nasty too!

10 Lessons I Learned From Scooby Doo

I remember racing home from the bus just so I could catch the last fifteen minutes of Scooby and the gang before my mother would flip the channel to Phil Donahue at 4pm. I learned a lot from Phil, but I also learned some important stuff from Scooby too. I have always loved Scooby Doo and over the years I've grown to appreciate the values this beloved show has taught me. 

1. Monsters are really just ordinary people.

2. You don't have to be beautiful to be cool.

3. A smart woman almost always saves the day.

4. Loyalty will get you everywhere.

5. You have to look deeper than the surface to see the truth.

6. True friends always have your back even when you're stoned or just plain stupid.

7. Over-eating will lead to a tummy ache every time.

8. Don't try to be too trendy, stick to a look that suits your personality.

9. When life get's overwhelming; sit back relax and enjoy a light snack.

10. You can learn a lot from meddlesome kids.


My darling son would also like it to be known that there should be a number eleven. So in honor of making him happy here is number eleven.

11. Scooby Snacks are really good!

Love, Kids, and Valentines

I remember the excitement Valentines Day always brought me when I was little. My mom always had boxes of chocolates for us and cards with wonderful things inside...a kitten bookmark, a pressed flower. Those tiny items dazzled my kid brain.

At school, we were lucky enough to have lavish parties. School parties were divine; cupcakes and suckers, lacy paper hearts, sharing your valentines, lots of laughing.

I always dressed in pink and red for Valentines Day, I still do. The big difference is that now I get to host the sweet little Valentine party.

These days I'm a bit more health conscious. This year we are having sliced banana with peanut butter garnish and raisins, popcorn, apple juice adorned with silly heart shaped crazy straws, and one sweet little organic sucker.

In the name of love, I decided that it might be cute to ask all those sweet little people just what Valentines Day means to them. Their answers aren't always what you might expect, but dang they're cute.

Malik age 3 - "Toys...I hide my eyes, I get candy. Ya, it's good."

Juliette age 6 - "It means that I love my family, and valentines means that my heart is telling me to love other people, and I love the way I know they love me when they look at me."

Anabel age 4 - "I don't know. Oooh, just like plates. Nothing on them. Just one lollyop. No cards, I already have cards, I don't need them."

Zachary age 5 - "It's when you put up stickers on your windows."

Chase age 4 - It's a party at school and handing out cards and bubbles because we love our friends."

Emily age 4 - "It means that we love mom and dad and we have to make them a card."

Sean age 5 - "Hugs, kisses, and candy."

Jayda age 5 - "A day for valentines goodies."

Tanner age 3 - "Love Mommy."

Jacob age 7 - "You give something to Mom."


I think they all did a marvelous job of summing up Valentines Day! I certainly hope yours is filled with love, hugs, and candy. :)

How Are Your Boobs?

Do you remember your very first bra? Mine was red and white, with a picture of Betty Boop on the cup and I was ecstatic. Wearing a bra is a right of passage for a young girl, the doorway to becoming a woman.

My family is full of large breasted women. We are either genetically blessed or cursed depending on your view point. In my personal life, my boobs have literally become an extension of me. I like to say, that wherever my boobs decide to go, I follow. I've been walking behind them most of my life. I don't just walk into a room, my gigantic chest barrels through a few seconds before I do.

And, those gals get a lot of attention. I used to try to hide them in sweatshirts and coats, but sooner or later the weather would grow warmer, and I would be forced to expose them. Tank tops have never been my friend; support bras, under-wire nightmares, and reducers have shaped and molded my mammories for years. I respect those lacy menageries.

I have always wanted to have nice small breasts. Breasts that allow for easy running. Breasts that don't require three bras to hop on the treadmill. I've never really understood anyone wanting larger boobs. The grass is always greener I suppose.

I read something recently about the "secret things woman do" and I was quite startled to read that chicks often get together and compare their boobies and nipples. I was really surprised. I've NEVER done that. I don't know why? Perhaps I was insecure. Never the less I do not see the need to compare. My boobs are my boobs, your boobs are yours. Hopefully we both have healthy happy boobs.

Over the years, I've found large breasts can be quite useful.


1. They make excellent beverage holders.

2. They can be used as floating devices.

3. The are great for holding a good book.

4. They make excellent pillows.

5. Hey, they can hold small animals. (Sorry, I couldn't resist when I saw this meme.)

No matter what, remember that your boobs (big, small, high, low) are awesome! Happy healthy boobies are wonderful, so go out and enjoy your boobs!